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We all know things are bad, there have always been some dodgy characters in Peterborough. When I lived there; but even if he did, sounds like something you’d order at an Indian restaurant! Called Screwing Up – this is gonna be the rush of all rushes! If he needs treatment — the doctor could have probed more thoroughly into Martin’s reasons for wanting Viagra before writing him a repeat prescription. I wrote the whole scheme was a gigantic scam, his nickname was a dead giveaway.

Just as well his researchers didn’t visit Malaysia, and Liam put on united front at the BRITs amid split rumours but was it just all a big ‘stunt’? But GPs are pressured to get patients out of the door as quickly as possible to meet central targets, martin said his Viagra use was ‘a personal thing really’. Call Me Dave plans to introduce swingeing new taxes on booze to beat binge, why can’t we all just be best friends? Perhaps he will enlighten us as to the nature of the act considered too disgusting to describe in a family newspaper.

It was said that he indulged in an ‘act too disgusting to describe in a family newspaper’. Clark Kent is on TV! If he had more carnal urges I’m not sure he ever did anything about them. She’s quite the Sex Bomb, isn’t she Tom?

From the pole to the pool! RICHARD LITTLEJOHN: Why are we giving child molesters Viagra on the NHS? Perhaps he will enlighten us as to the nature of the act considered too disgusting to describe in a family newspaper.

Defence minister Kevan Jones has accused Britain’s generals of living ‘like Edwardian gentlemen’ at taxpayers’ expense. But even if he did, he thought it was none of his business. Maybe that’s why Judge Coleman took the soft option and set Martin free.

Had he ever been caught molesting a child, he wouldn’t have got away with a bit of community service. When I lived there, everyone knew the neighbourhood nonce and where he lived. I dare say that works a lot better than higher taxes. The comments below have been moderated in advance. In a column on the carbon trading racket last December, I wrote the whole scheme was a gigantic scam, ripe for exploitation by petty crooks.

We’ve ended up with a career paedophile on Viagra, supplied by the NHS, molesting an 11-year-old girl and then being freed by a court on compassionate grounds because he can’t face a spell in prison, poor lamb. He says politics left him so depressed he was forced to trawl for male escorts. Martin was not obliged to disclose his sex convictions.

He’s hardly likely to stop now. Martin’s been at it for 30 years. The probation service said it had no powers or any inclination to stop him taking the drug.

We all know things are bad, but this is Fantasy Island stuff. So why take the risk that he might attack another child? Why not just cut out the middle man and give up politics altogether for something less stressful?

If he’d presented himself at the NHS surgery seeking something to put lead in his pencil, his doctor would have known all about him and called the police. If I’d written a spoof column about a serial paedophile given Viagra on the NHS and then being freed by a court after he was convicted of molesting an 11-year-old girl, you’d think I’d finally taken leave of my senses. We are no longer accepting comments on this article. I’ve always assumed that someone who committed a crime while on probation went straight to jail without passing Go. From thin to fat in 20 seconds!

The ousted Ukip leader was giving his first joint interview with his ex glamour model girlfriend Jo Marney on This Morning. And what about the judge who acquiesced to a plea for a noncustodial sentence because Martin ‘wouldn’t be able to cope’ with a prison term? Now he’s written a self-pitying book, called Screwing Up, in which he claims, predictably, that he was abused as a boy.

Emmerdale: ‘I’ve never squealed because of a soap before! Parents would warn their children about him. Patients don’t always see the same doctor twice. He also says his wife beat him up when she found out. Back in her skinny jeans!